Obnoxio, my favourite cunt! I know just how harmful masturbation really is. Myself and fellatio friend Boatang were engaged in some mutual masturbation this morning - we offered to let Al Jahom join in, but he claimed to be busy - and I got a load of really nasty stuff in my eye. Still stinging, several hours later. Boatang's in the bad books for... ooh, another two hours at least.
If you want to come over and engage with us in the masturbatory way Obo, you are welcome. Even though you write a lot of stuff we disagree with, which makes you a cunt. It'll stop your keyboard getting all messy. Boatang might even be able to sell you his old keyboard. Only £2.74...
I hear that they are sending some chronic masterbaters to amsterdam to visit working girls all paid for by the taxpayer, you could put a claim in or ask them to get you one of these
The Full Stroke masturbation machine will deliver one of the most intense orgasm experiences you will ever have by combining a generous 2.5 inch stroke with a light suction pull on the upstroke.
17 comments:
Try swapping hands.
Wait 'til you've finished before typing.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. Nobody can complain that this impediment of yours is stopping us from understanding your posts, at least.
Jourdemayne: by gosh, I think you may be onto something there!
Thanks!
Wipe the keyboard when you're all done - stops the keys sticking.
More good ideas, keep 'em coming ... er ...
Hire an assistant?
Preferably a vaguely humanoid carbon based lifeform.
Squawk!
Obnoxio, my favourite cunt! I know just how harmful masturbation really is. Myself and fellatio friend Boatang were engaged in some mutual masturbation this morning - we offered to let Al Jahom join in, but he claimed to be busy - and I got a load of really nasty stuff in my eye. Still stinging, several hours later. Boatang's in the bad books for... ooh, another two hours at least.
If you want to come over and engage with us in the masturbatory way Obo, you are welcome. Even though you write a lot of stuff we disagree with, which makes you a cunt. It'll stop your keyboard getting all messy. Boatang might even be able to sell you his old keyboard. Only £2.74...
Squawk!
"Wait 'til you've finished before typing."
Get one of those translucent flexible keyboard covers that pubs and food outlets use.
Or.... Can't you find someone to give you a blowjob? - preferably a swallower....
Microdave, I thought I'd found someone, but she turned out to be all mouth and no trousers.
Erm...
A keyboard cover it is then....
Tip,
When your 'inflatable friend' drools on you when you kiss her, it's time to empty her out.
Unlike you, I don't shop at the Sunshine Club.
Sounds like you might be developing RSI, otherwise known as 'Wanker's Wrist'.
Wrap a crepe bandage tightly around it.
No, you fool. The wrist.
Invest in (Ohh) "Dragon Naturally Speaking" dictation software.
Then (Ohhhh) you can (Ohhhhhhh) really multitask. (Where's the Kleenex?)
Notice how his avatar depicts him leaning back, panting...
I hear that they are sending some chronic masterbaters to amsterdam to visit working girls all paid for by the taxpayer, you could put a claim in or ask them to get you one of these
The Full Stroke masturbation machine will deliver one of the most intense orgasm experiences you will ever have by combining a generous 2.5 inch stroke with a light suction pull on the upstroke.
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