Channel surfing tonight revealed some horror show about someone called "Cheryl Cole", who is evidently some professional fuckbuddy for a professional footballer. Evidently, there was some marital dispute and "the whole country was on Cheryl Cole's side."
In the interests of accuracy, I should point out that this was clearly not true.
I want them both dead of face cancer.
9 comments:
I think that puts you in a minority. Most blokes would like to see Mr Cheryl dead of face cancer, thus improving their chances of copping off with the Tyneside Lovely by 0.00000001%.
Her wee sister lives on a tyneside coucil estate as a single mum. I'm sure if you gave her a good scrub and some anorexia she'd look just the same and if you drank something above the calibre of Buckfast she'd be a fucksight easier than The Cheryl to get into.
I've shagged her. Her fanny was so big, I had to strap a plank to my arse to stop me falling in.
I don't have a telly
wv 'jailo' LOL
Obnoxio,
Your trouble is that you watch the wrong kind of telly, or even none.
Or, worse, you read the wrong kind of stuff.
Efferboddy knows, that you have to watch the State-Telly, and read the sleb-slabs. Otherwise, you'll be a saddo, cozz you won't know what's really going on in the nation.
And your children will report you to the Gestapo, saying that you're ill, and that you need help from some biggish guys who'll come round in the night.
Where the f*** have you been all these years, you idiot? You'll get all us bloggers into unrepute, if you go on about not knowing who these really really famous people are.Do yer f*****g homework. Now.
Coz' the big-guys will all think we're like you, and will come around here as well.
Here is an interesting situation.
If you don't know who Cheryl Cole is - and why she is relevant to today's society - how can you be sure that you don't live in as much a dream world as the politicians you detest?
You use 1984 as your complaint against politicians.
I would suggest that you read I Am Legend - and work out which side you are on!
Face cancer?
A bit harsh, perhaps.
For myself, I just don't watch football or pay anything to Sky.
Now the NHL, that's a different matter entirely.
DEAD of face cancer?
For vain bastards like these two, to survive it and live with the mutilation would be a far better punishment.
In my youth, each Saturday morning, me my brthers with a sixpenny bag of boiled sweets would toddle off to the local flea pit sans parents to watch one of those now-defunct adventure films. Ms Cole reminds me of those days every time I see her. This is mainly due to her reminding me of what the square-jawed adventurer inevtiably came across in the jungle just before entering the African village. A skull on a stick.
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