Every week, the Prime Mentalist faces questions from the rest of Westmonster. Rather than endure the tedium of the event for yourself, allow me to knock up a quick summary of how it goes every week:
1. The man with the forehead asks a blindingly obvious question. The Prime Mentalist ignores the question, because acknowledging the simple truth would make him look bad and stutters and waffles on in circles until he can think of a way of blaming the man with the forehead for something vaguely related.
2. This repeats for a number of iterations.
3. Then rank and file politicians get to ask questions of the Prime Mentalist. If they are from Labour back-benchers, they are soft, cuddly questions that fellate the Prime Mentalist gently, if they are from the opposition then the Prime Mentalist stutters and waffles on in circles until he can think of a way of blaming the leader of the relevant party for something vaguely related.
4. All the politicians look jolly pleased with themselves, as well they might do in their lovely cocooned lives.
What a load of cock. Fuck them all, they're all self-serving cunts.
11 comments:
You forgot two entries:
3.1 - That bloke who's name no-one can remember, who is in charge of that party nobody quite trusts, but doesn't hate as much as the others, asks a couple of questions which normally come out of left-field and are on points of very much secondary importance.
3.2 - All the other MPs guffaw and throw pitiful looks akin to those used when a woman tries to explain the offside rule to her friend in the pub on a Sunday when the football's on, and gets it wrong.
Doesn't some bloke shout order-order a few times (in between lending the Police the keys to the place)?
It would be nice if the rank and file didn't start each question with "Would the R.H. Face-chewer agree with me.." or at least if Brown would say "No, do I fuck.." once in a while
I still say the rules should be changed so that the Prime Minister is required to answer the question. If he doesn't the asker is allowed to put the question again... and continue putting it even if they are there all bloody day.
Or maybe they should just have 5 minutes of throwing custard pies at one another?
"Or maybe they should just have 5 minutes of throwing custard pies at one another?"
Only if the number of pies used, and the cost, is fully disclosed...
you forgot to mention about dennis skinner slagging of nulabour fat cats!
Not only force him to answer the question, but remove all labour MPs except the cabinet (or at least the part of the cabinet that have a commons constituency).
With no Labour MPs it will drastically cut down the wasted time in puerile noise and sycophantic questions - and if they really really have to ask their stupid question then they can send a memo.
I suppose it's a bit harsh to remove all Labour MPs. I'd probably let the ones who have been banned from the commons in, and all those who have voted against the whip in the last 3 votes.
PMQ little more than a farcical panto. He hasn't the wit or education for humourous repartee.
And when those nice muslims wanted to shoot him, why didn't the police give them some guns and drive them to Downing Street, then charge them, or would such screw the promotion programme within the Revenue Enforcement and Collection Service*, with some missing out on their politically appointed jobs and the trough. Can't have that can we.
It could be made much more fun if waterboarding was permitted.
*The Met. Pol. Auth. is listed as a corporation at Dun & Bradstreet
John Pickworth, the clue is in the name. If the PM had to answer the questions, it would be called "Prime Minister's Answers".
With you on the custard pies, provided they also contain explosives.
"With you on the custard pies, provided they also contain explosives."
And Ebola. Might as well be thorough...
Turing word: belyhful What I've had of these parasites...
"And Ebola. Might as well be thorough..."
I like it, nice touch.
Purple coloured flour bombs are good too. The poor darlings looked positively freaked out the last time someone started throwing that about the place.
Doubly delightful when Gordon gets a face full of the stuff too
;-)
And its not just you, its 4 out of 5 MPs
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/7845608.stm
Gordon brown = Huge Cunt, I hope he dies in a house fire
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