Monday, 27 July 2009

Before I even read it, I knew what was coming


Call for action to cut pensioner poverty

Let's look at that for a second: "call for action to cut pensioner poverty". Why not just say "give pensioners more money"? That's what you're asking for, isn't it? Why the spurious "action"?

Anyway, before I read the article, let's make a guess: a fake charity is leading for some Labour "vote-winning" soundbite initiative. There'll almost certainly be some nasty statistical flummery in there, too.

So, what do we have?

Reform of the pensions and benefits system is urgently needed to tackle pensioner poverty in the UK, which is among the worst in Europe, campaigners said today.

Among the worst in Europe? UK pensioners get a pretty shit deal, but among the worst in Europe? And who are these "campaigners"?

Michelle Mitchell, charity director for Age Concern and Help the Aged, said the report demonstrated that even in the years of growth before the recession, many older people were being left behind.

Ah! Age Concern. Hmmm...

And what is the deal here?

The call for action came after European commission statistics showed that 30% of over-65s in the UK were living on incomes far below the national average.

Income below the national average? Well, OK, but those of us who are still working have got mortgages to pay and stuff. If you took responsibility for your own life, you'd be looking at having your house paid for and stuff. Wouldn't you? So you'd need less money, wouldn't you? Anyway.

But it's all a can of fucking bollocks anyway, because ... it's this relative poverty crap again.

The EU study found pensioners in the Czech Republic were least likely to be living in poverty, with 5% below the threshold of an income of 60% of the national median.

So, if the Czech median national income is £5,000, and you earn more than £3,000, you're not "in poverty". If the UK median national income is £20,000 and you only earn £10,000, you're "in poverty". But if you took the same income and went to live in the Czech Republic, you'd be absolutely minted. However, as far as the EU is concerned, you'd be poor.

And really, the ONLY WAY you could eliminate relative poverty is if every single person earned the exact same amount of money. How fucking horrible would that be? And it gets worse, if everyone did earn the same money and you were ultra frugal and somehow saved up, your interest earnings would cause you to earn more and you'd put everyone else into relative poverty.

Can you see how stupid and pointless this relative poverty crap is yet?


Anonymous said...

The next time someone complains about someone living in relative poverty in the UK, I AM GOING TO POKE THEIR FUCKING EYE OUT WITH A BURNING STICK.

JuliaM said...

Age Concern..?

Would that be this Age Concern complaining about 'pensioners being left behind'?

Ah ha ha ha ha!

UB41 said...

Ugh, does my head in.

There needs to be some sensible rules around this poverty cr*p.

Was it on here I read the other day about child poverty being defined based on median income.

FFS, there needs to be a sensible measure based on typical consumption patterns (an no, I don't believe not being able to afford an iPod means you're poverty stricken!)

Roger Thornhill said...

Indeed, relative poverty is a meme used to bootstrap in a cosy sinecure for swathes of ricebowlers.

Fred Z said...

Half the peepuls have less income than the average!!!

Give them more money, RIGHT NOW, to correct this patent unfairness!!!

Mitch said...

I smell another labor law stating that "after the next election if/when the Tories win it will be illegal to be a poor pensioner"
Or some such cuntwaffle from the usual bunch of fuktards.

MrAngryman said...

I iz poor ini? i haz only enuf money for me rolliez and me sky +. Its right stich up innit. those poor peeple in Africa right, they dont kno how hard it iz living in the ghetto. me and me bruvvas need more money, i want a playstation dont i, its me uman rights after all!