Thursday, 7 June 2012

Damp Squib?

On Sunday, I went out for a drive in the cuntryside in Cambridgeshire, which, apart from the LibDumb shithole of Cambridge itself, is about as Tory and patriotic a county as you could find.

And I have to say there was precious little visible evidence of jubileeation to be seen. A handful of bunting here and there, not a great deal of commitment shown anywhere.

Similarly, I was utterly unconvinced by the "flotilla" of rag-tag boats and the pomp and circumstance. It didn't really look like anything above and beyond the normal levels of pomp and circumstance.

The concert at Buckingham Palace was, in my opinion, excruciatingly awful, apart from the fireworks and the projects. A collection of past-their-prime singers who, apart from Stevie Wonder, sounded like they'd fail the auditions for X-Factor's Got Voice or whatever the fuck it's called.

And the "comedians". Seriously. They should all have been taken outside and shot.

It's depressing when the man who should be most irritated by Brenda's longevity was the best and most entertaining speaker at the event.

The whole thing (apart from the pomp and circumstance) looked like a half-assed celebration of mediocrity, a remarkably apt celebration of everything that makes Britain meh, a country facing relegation that still thinks it's a contender for the cup.

Now, as an anarchist, I don't think we should be celebrating the Jubilee or anything else. But since I'm in a very small minority, I have to ask why it was such a half-arsed event. The overwhelming majority of twitter seemed pro-Jubilee, and I tend to follow a pretty wide spectrum of political views. So why was there such a poor showing on the day(s)?

Go big or go home. I think Eastenders is on, if that helps you make your mind up.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

When I first heard about the flotilla, I assumed it would be some grand thing of military boats, exotic boats, perhaps boats brightly painted and decorated.

The excuses being made for it, that the BBC coverage wasn't very good are just a desperate attempt to cover over what happened which was a rather pitiful event.

It was just "here's a lot of boats". If looking at boats gets you moist then you'd probably love it, but it had no sense of grandeur or occassion. Boats didn't come down in groups, they weren't brightly decorated, and you can't just have "here's some more boats".

For many, many years, you had the Royal Tournament. They knew how to put on events, they understood spectacle and style. They'd have had a re-enactment of a battle, or a rigging race or river jousting, or some blokes with big drums from Korea, or some sailors dancing the hornpipe. You probably had a dedicated team working on it all the year and in times past, they'd have been roped into doing this.

Instead, some civil servant probably thought this up, having removed every idea that might offend someone or break elf and safety, resulting in something that was as interesting as processed cheese.

I bet people who really, really just like looking at boats liked it, but as a spectacle for everyone else it was rubbish.