In other news...

... some fat, old has-been fuckwit is calling for calm in ZNL ranks:

I bet you never thought John Prescott would end up blogging but I felt this was the best way to talk to ordinary members at this important time.

writes former Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott

"Ordinary" members? That's mighty fucking white of him, isn't it?

It’s been quite a year, hasn’t it?

Without any hint of irony.

I’m sure I also speak for all of you in wishing Gordon, Sarah and their boys a thoroughly deserved break and that they have a wonderful time in Southwold. I have every confidence that he will come back refreshed, renewed and ready to lead us through these difficult times.

Actually, I hope that he contracts some disgusting disease to go along with his metaphorical leprosy and spends the next 11 years in terminal agony. And that his beard is revealed as a closet lesbian.

I also hope that my fellow Labour MPs will take a break too - both from the Westminster bubble and divisive talk of a pointless leadership challenge.

Oh, please, John: stop! You're killing me! Do you really think the sleek, greedy, power-hungry apparatchiks, who have been grooming themselves for the highest office in this land are going to pay the blindest bit of attention to you?

I’ve been honoured to work very closely with the last three leaders - John, Tony and Gordon. I’m also proud to have worked with all of Labour’s cabinet ministers since 1997. We have undoubtedly some very talented men and women. But with respect, none of them at the present moment, has anywhere near the skills and experience, nationally and internationally, to lead this great party and country as we tackle these unprecedented major global problems.

Translation: you're all a useless bunch of fucking gobshites.

It’s only a year since party members, trade unions and MPs unanimously voted for Gordon to become our leader. Let me make this very clear - party members and the public will never forgive MPs and others who force Labour to go through another leadership election in less than two years.

That’s what Tory and Lib Dem MPs do. It’s not the Labour way.

So my message to Labour MPs is this – let’s take a break from feeding Westminster gossip and hostile press prattle, recharge your batteries and if you want to campaign, get out in your constituencies and start campaigning for that fourth term.

That’s what our party wants and what our country needs.

What our country needs, John, is for the trough-snuffling, mendacious, arrogant cunts who have pissed a decade of Tory-provided prosperity against the wall of social engineering; who have treacherously sold this country into EU bondage; who have stolen from us, lied to us, led us into an illegal war; who have put party expediency ahead of any benefit to the people of Great Britain, along with their cohorts in the BBC and the media and those who have profited from unethically-obtained government business, along with those Town and District councillors who have conspired to wage a petty war on us all by means of speed cameras, dustbin monitoring, extortionate charges and egregious snooping, to be hung from a vast array of lamp-posts down Whitehall and down every High Street in every town and city in Great Britain.

The only reason you might escape, you fat, overblown pig, is because there might not be a rope strong enough to carry your porcine bulk.

PS: You clearly didn't write that shit, because it's coherent. More mendacity.