Children as young as eight have been recruited by councils to "snoop" on their neighbours and report petty offences such as littering, the Daily Telegraph can disclose.
Christ, when I was eight, if I said anything uncalled for about another adult, my parents would have beaten the crap out of me, and rightly so.
But now, councils (who also have the right to take your kids away from you) are enlisting children to report on adults? I can't see any problem with that, can you? I mean, kids will never ever make shit up to get some cantankerous old fuck into trouble, will they? Won't give noisy little turds their football back after the seventh time they've broken a window? Straight to the council, mate!
Shopkeeper won't sell you fags, just because you're eight? Shop the cunt on a fly-tipping charge, complete with photoshopped evidence, because, of course:
"environment volunteers" ... are being encouraged to photograph or video neighbours guilty of dog fouling, littering or "bin crimes".
Bin crimes? BIN CRIMES???? What the fuck are these people smoking? Why the cunting fuck are the slimy little turds not just fucking emptying our bins, which is, after all, what we pay the useless thieving FUCKS so generously for? Since fucking when was it a crime for me to stick something in a fucking waste bin and expect the useless fucking cocksucking dictators in the council to fucking pick it up?
But luckily, it's not widespread. Oh, no. It's only one out of every six fucking councils indulging in this fascist madness. And God help you if you live in Bromley:
Bromley Council in Kent offers up to £500 for information that leads to a conviction.
Five hundred quid of YOUR fucking tax money can go to some snooping fuckwit who stitches you up and may or may not have made up the evidence.
Jesus.
Just savour that for a moment. Councils can invade your house without a warrant, spy on you to make sure you're not cheating on your council tax, tap your phone to see if you're flytipping, employ children to spy on you and take the word of children over those of adults ... all because of fucking bin crimes???????????????? And these fucking bin crimes are not even British bin crimes, they're a consequence of EU recycling legislation that has its basis not in concern for the environment in Britain, but in the need for regulation in Brussels.
I did a little bit of research and found that another well-known amoral totalitarian cunt tried this shit before, but even he had the decency to wait till the little shits were ten:
He came to a bad end. The cunts who are running these programs may well want to reflect upon that. Because one day this is going to go pop, and your claims that you were just following EU orders will not be a valid defence.
You spineless, authoritarian little fucks.
5 comments:
So on balance are you for or against the proposal? I couldn't tell.
So on balance are you for or against the proposal? I couldn't tell.
Sorry, I'll try and clarify my thoughts when I sober up.
The way things are going it might be better not to sober up for at least two years. Then a couple of days sober, just to see what it's like with the Tories in charge, and it's likely to be straight back to that bottle.
Best stock up before they making the legal drinking age 95.
Ah, a country full of Father Jack Hacketts. Could be worse.
Who am I kidding? It is worse.
"I did a little bit of research and found that another well-known amoral, socialist, totalitarian cunt tried this shit before, but even he had the decency to wait till the little shits were ten:"
There, fixed.
Positivity, positivity. Local councillors have to publish their addresses - they are all on the local authority websites - and so you know where to start looking for your first £500 quid. Plus, if the toy police get shirty and want to know what you are doing, you can now truthfully say you are a bounty hunter authorized by the local authority, which doesn't look like it needs much authorization as you only have to ring up with a report and claim your £500 in the event of a nick.
I will probably dress as an Avon Lady just for a bit of cover, but otherwise I intend to get down wit da kidz and harvest, harvest, harvest.
I will also check the council employees. More work as I'll have to be sure to get the right ones and cross-check with the electoral register in the library but hey, they don't give you £500 for nothing.
Didn't Lee Majors have an unlikely series once about a bounty hunter for bail bonders, who did part-time stunt work? Every body loved him. I'm not doing the stunt work, though. I'll do make-up like in Edward Scissorhands and combine it with the bounty hunting. I'm going to be famous, the studios will be all over me.
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