Tuesday, 27 January 2009

Rural drivers ...

... are cunts.

That is all.

17 comments:

John Pickworth said...

Ooooh!

You haven't run into one have you?

Anonymous said...

Got caught behind a slow moving tractor that stopped you driving like madman down small country lanes for all of 5 minutes I suppose.

Obnoxio The Clown said...

@anonymong: actually, I did, but that wasn't what fucked me off. What fucked me off was the habit of waiting for ages for you to come along and then pull out right in front of you.

It was too cold and slippery for driving like a madman down cuntry lanes. :o(

Henry North London said...

Yes Its that small ford fiesta in front of you that does 45mph on a 60mph road and the moment you try an overtake it speeds up so you pull back and the cunt that is driving it pulls back to 45 mph again.

Its an almost certain event

GrumpyOldTwat said...

I'm a rural cunt.

It's a game I play.
The more I annoy those town drivers, the more I laugh.

Cato said...

I'm with GrumpyOldTwat on this.
Slow down you tosser!!.....pmsl

Prodicus said...

Oi.



WV: rankleno.
As in 'Gordon Brown is a rank leno'.

BulloPill said...

Greetings from Rural Worcestershire

Oi! I'm a "rural driver" - have to be, no public transport affordable or reliable round here thanks to Worst Group taking over the buses from good ole Midland Red.

Don't like driving on rural roads - stay the fuck away then. We don't need townie twats clogging up our roads.

Round these parts the roads are in a shocking state, caused by lots of heavy goods vehicles taking fruit and veg to the supermarkets. Huge tax take from the warehouse sites and the lorries, but fuck all of it spent on maintaining the roads.

My pet hate is the townies who motor down on Sundays to look at the luvely scenery and quaint old cottages (do you suppose Lord Fondlebum of Boys visits?) and fark about doing 25mph on our main roads. Grrrrrr.

wv: lymproad IKYN

Anonymous said...

You can only say that if you drive there yourself .... and that makes you a rural driver and therefore .............

Anonymous said...

It's a game: the tractors lie in wait for victims. The longer the queue - the more points they score.

The sheep-shagging cunts.

Patrick McGroin said...

if it was a john deere in north cumbria...muhahahahahaha, beats old people who drive 45 mph EVERYWHERE! out side schools in a 20 zone, on the motorway. far worse than me. Also when i'm in the city in my tractor, which i know goes 35 mph, (5mph faster than the limit), people getting fucking irate, fuckin townies

Advanced Media Watch said...

I cant stand urban rural drivers, ie why you need a 4x4 in a city is beyond me.

Back to actual rural drivers on rural roads, they piss me off big time. They fcuking farmers park all that tractor junk right on road bends and leave so much crap on the roads behind them when limping in and out of fields, smelly gits...

Rob said...

Rural drivers tend to drive faster on country roads, not slower, at least in my experience.

In the Lake District you can always tell a local because (s)he is doing 50mph on a road covered in ice.

Obnoxio The Clown said...

For all those delightful sister-fuckers who commented on how much they enjoy messing with the townies, I'd just like to point out that when the roads are visibly icy, everyone slows down. Even townies. Even deranged locals.

This means that the inbred cunts who wait to pull out in front of you a) wait EVEN LONGER and b) are taking even more of a chance than usual.

Cunts.

Dave H said...

For the purposes of argument I agree, absolutely.

So why the fuck don't you damn townie cunts just stay in your polluted festering slums?

Obnoxio The Clown said...

It's the only way that we get to piss you off! :o)

GrumpyOldTwat said...

Ooh yes, icy is best. So much more fun.

Later the better. Then you can clearly see 'townies' eyes widen to the size of saucers, as they brake in disbelief and disappear up their own arse with rage.

I generally give a pathetic 'sorry type wave' as I pull out in front, laughing.

I will then proceed with caution. After all, it is icy you know. You can't be too careful.

BTW, I have no sister so I tend to pull a nice young lamb onto my cock instead. Once I've given the frolicking little fucker a good basting, I pop it into the oven and roast it for my Sunday lunch.