Monday, 24 August 2009

Bang! And the waste is gone!

I actually have of bottle of this under the kitchen sink, but now I'm too fucking scared to use it:

Decontamination experts at the former nuclear site at Dounreay, northern Scotland, are using the Cillit Bang household cleaner to remove radioactive plutonium stains.

Bang! And the reactor is gone!


Martin said...

Someone should pour that stuff over the cabinet. They're one bunch of wank stains we'd love to see gone.

SaltedSlug said...

Heh, I've worked on the crane system at Dounreay in a previous life.

Slugs diagnosis: That place is all fucked up, yo.

They've probably tried everything else and thought "What the hell".

On a similar note, a colleague from Sellafield told me this anecdote:

There are many storage facilities at Sellafield, containing different grades of nuclear waste. Several of these containers are essentially large lead-lined vats sat in a room which is sealed, with a two foot thick piece of leaded glass in one side of the room for observation (so they could presumably see if it leaked, or to use the manipulator arms).

Anyway, despite the truly immense level of radiation in the chamber, something was growing in on the other side of the glass; a kind of lichen or mould.
This was a bit of a bother, and so the various assembled bods were discussing possible ways of cleaning the glass, when one not-particularly-switched-on middle manager (A man also known as the Thumb-of-Doom for reasons I shall discuss another time) piped up:

"My mum normally uses half a potato."

And thus the legend of the newly-christened Spudboy was born.

sixtypoundsaweekcleaner said...

Raw potato is good on burns too, apparently.

David Gillies said...

I thought Cillit Bang was a midfielder for West Brom.

microdave said...

This has got be worth Cillit Bang making a new TV advert!

On the other hand most products that actually work have been withdrawn or reformulated because they weren't Environmentally Friendly". So either it IS dangerous, or there was nothing wrong with all the things I can't buy any more...