Tuesday, 12 January 2010

It's enough to make you weep

iDave dishes out some major facepalmology:

Sure Start children's centres would move away from providing universal services for all parents with young children and focus on the most disadvantaged and 'dysfunctional' families, under Conservative party plans for 'a new generation' of Sure Start centres.

Conservative leader David Cameron said that the new model of Sure Start would focus on early intervention, with staff paid partly by results.

Oh for fucking fuck's sake: let me guess who decides who's the most disadvantaged and dysfunctional families - could it possibly be those wonderful Mongoloids in Social Services who brought us cases like Baby P and Victoria Climbie? And instead of offering a simple payment mechanism to market providers, the state is going to be employing not only the people to do the work, but crucially, 87 layers of management bureaucracy, all paid top whack rates ... by you and me.

And doesn't your soul just wither at the idea of another area in which the government is going to focus on "early intervention"? It's either going to be too early or not early enough, because individual cases have individual requirements and individual requirements require a lot of resources - much more that the government will actually provide. So it will be a once-size-fits-all "solution" that gets delivered.

More government is iDave's solution - whatever the problem. I can't wait to be shot of the Gorgon, but really, iDave will be no different to the last 12 year of Labour's nannying, hectoring, bullying, clusterfuck incompetence. He hasn't even won yet and I already fucking hate him.


Anonymous said...

He hasn't even won yet and I already fucking hate him


Hence why I don't intend to vote for the supercilious cunt. I hope and pray the silent majority intend to teach all three main parties a big fat lesson in May

Wellington Dave said...

The Tories need to actually "get" this, before it's too late.
The various current nicknames for Dave don't do this, so I propose he is universally named "Ding" as in "Dave is not Gordon". Because, that is just about the only reason for a Tory lead in the polls right now.
If they are serious about giving our NuLabour Soviet Overlords a thorough kicking then it's time to cut out crap like this and the rest of the big/more government bullshit. I fully expect to see the name "Ding" spreading all the way to the Andrew Marr show and PMQ's within weeks.

That ought to focus their attention.

former tory said...

i agree he is a cunt, and to think i voted torie the last three times because they were bigger cunts. I now know the error of my ways, and won't vote at all. At least i will be able to proudly say "this wasn't my fault" when he watches things get even more fucked up.

And yes, idave, getting more fucked up less slowly is still getting more fucked up. Get ready to inherit a mess and for it to become your mess.

fuck you

JuliaM said...

Anyone have any idea how hard and for how long I have to bang my head on this desk before iDave starts looking like an attractive prospect for my vote?

Obnoxio The Clown said...

JuliaM: I've been doing it non-stop for about six months and it hasn't helped.

Wellington Dave: Excellent idea!

Fidel Cuntstruck said...

"Conservative leader David Cameron said that the new model of Sure Start would focus on early intervention, with staff paid partly by results."

And just how the hell is that going to work? It's blatant vote buying and nothing else - we heard all these lovely dreams in 1997 albeit from someone wearing a different coloured rosette - did it happen?

Did it fuck.

I'm becoming increasingly concerned about iDave - the veneer of real worth is wearing thin even before the election has been called.

Ding - I like that although I suspect it may have to be Dig - Dave-is-Gordon because I fear he'll turn out to be another great master of the clusterfuck

Sperm Lewis said...

Wales was used as a guinea pig for the early intervention scheme 'ASBOs for Foetuses'. The local slappers used to staple them to their bumps when they went out on the piss.

"There are no criminals. There are only the victims of inadequate social services"

- Evelyn Waugh, Love Among the Ruins

J Demetriou said...

Agree with the piece entirely


Mitch said...

We so need a revolution in this here cuntry.

David said...

I do not know how anybody can take your post seriously when your first sentence is so overtly offensive.....and not just to civil servants

JP said...

It's reasons like this blog post Obo that make me still come on this blog, even with my current J Demetriou inspired antagonism with the blogging world.

Keep it up.

Alan said...

Dave Is Nearly Gordon