Wednesday, 27 January 2010

Spitting

What the fuck is it with people and spitting, anyway? On my travels, it's practically impossible to go anywhere and not stand in someone's freshly hoicked-up puddle of saliva.

I've never felt the urge to gob anywhere, not even when, as a much younger man, I used to play rugby or soccer (which is where I assume the role models come from.) And strangely enough, even if there is a need to gob when playing at the very highest level of sport, YOU'RE NOT PLAYING AT THE FUCKING HIGHEST LEVEL OF SPORT WHEN YOU'RE WALKING DOWN THE STREET WITH A FAG IN ONE HAND AND A FUCKING CAN OF WHITE DIAMOND IN THE OTHER, YOU FESTERING COCK-MUNCHER!!!!!!!!!

15 comments:

Old Holborn said...

Have a heart. Millions out there are just trying to learn how to pronounce Boatang & Demetriou properly

marcuscleaver said...

Sorry :(

Bugger said...

There have been a few times in my life when I really regret not being able to gob spit. Not a spray job but a real mucous directed darty one.

The times usually concern meeting a politician face to face.

sixtypoundsaweekcleaner said...

Better out than in.

john miller said...

Soccer? Does anyone who has played it ever call it that?

I think you've been found out Clown, as a rugger playing middle class proper school person!

Obnoxio The Clown said...

I may be all those things, but I used to play soccer as well.

Cunt.

Ed P said...

Get your fake blood capsules and expectorate over Bliar at the enquiry on Friday.
Now that would be a spit-in I'd like to see!

Anonymous said...

As a result of so many polluting chemical firms in Huddersfield, spitting has long been the mainstay of prophylactic health care here, Obno.

We are less tolerant of any refusal by a pet, to pick up their owner's poop after it has defecated on the pavement.

Beware of Geeks bearing GIFs said...

It's the fuzzie wuzzies - they hoik up large globules of lung butter.

I was in a hostel once (student, interrail etc) and a load of middle eastern types wearing dodgy suits were constantly hawking phlegm into buckets by their beds.

All through the night the fuckers.

Then when we awoke, all our wallets had gone.

The dirty, thiefing, green oyster hawking fuckers.

Anonymous said...

Foreigners who spit on this country should be ejected.

Shepherd's Bush would be emptied immediately.

Sepp Bladder said...

"Soccer? Does anyone who has played it ever call it that?"

Yeah! You should have said.. rugger, or that wankers game, the one played by sufferers of Histrionic Personality Disease who fall on the floor and start crying if an opponent almost stands on their toes, then insult the ref when he doesn't fall for it.

microdave said...

O/T but here's one for you, Obo:

http://www.atom.com/funny_videos/ifreak/?xrs=cpc_sexyandfunny_ifreak

Not that I'm trying to suggest anything.....

Anonymous said...

You would enjoy it no end here in the far east the Chinese men most of whom smoke are coughing and hawking up all day long. Never heard of covering their mouth when coughing or sneezing cunts.

St Paul said...

I don't reckon the matter is complicated. The issue seems Monkey-see; Monkey-do. At least the yobbos playing televised soccer keep the inadequate members of society off the streets on Saturday afternoons.

Anonymous said...

Professional football as played in this country seems to be the only sport where continual spitting is required.