Sunday, 14 March 2010

Cheeses wept!

This cuntry really is a gutless shit pit of pussywhipped cocksniffers, isn't it?

One of the UK's oldest traditional events has been killed off this year after falling victim to health and safety concerns.

The annual cheese rolling-race, which sees contestants tumble 200 yards down a steep Cotswold hill to try to catch an 8lb Double Gloucester, is to be cancelled for the first time in its 200-year history.

Organisers claim the ancient May Bank Holiday event, held on Cooper’s Hill in Brockworth, Gloucester, has become ‘too popular’ and that the local authorities ‘couldn’t cope’.

Useless cunts.

8 comments:

JuliaM said...

The list of things local authorities 'can't cope' with is a hell of a long one.

I think, as a result, we'll have to cancel:

Dogs defecating
Cars parking
All further snow flurries
Deciduous trees dropping leaves
Heavy rain

and so on...

Mitch said...

Why do these rectal warts feel they have to get involved with every little fuckin aspect of peoples lives?
Cant they just fuck off and die! or get a life.

manwiddicombe said...

I read somewhere that at last year's event there were 58 injuries including 6 fainting spectators and one who fell out of a tree ......

Ray said...

Ah man, you fell for it. This story is rolled out (pun intended) every fucking year. Seriously, a little bit of googling would have shown stories from 2009, 2008, back to 2003 (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/gloucestershire/2933480.stm). And yet, for all the banning, we still see the sport of reading about an annual festival which won't go ahead.

Ah well, much better to write about 'elfnsafety gawwwn maaaaaad!!

Longrider said...

Ray beat me to it. This one crops up every year and it still goes ahead. Good publicity, though.

Pat said...

I take inspiration from the fell running world. Put up posters warning the public that the event is to take place, and and advising them on no account to do it. Either the authorities have to post a guard on the venue- or there'll be plenty of volunteers attracted to the risks. Guarding private land, and barring road access is legally doubtful, and likely to be very unpopular- so I know where I place my bet.

Atheist Ranter said...

Problem is, Joe Public are likely to do as they are told when some twat in a reflective jacket with a clip board says "can't come in here sir, elf and safety say so".

More people need to use the phrase "who asked for your fuckin' opinion!" as they stride past waving one or two fingers in the twat's general direction.

Blend the bastards into fertilizer asap...

Chalcedon said...

Bloody hell! Pathetic eh? WTF are the police doing there anyway?

I shall be off to the May day cheese rolling in Stilton again this year. A chance to drink lots of beer and watch colourful teams rolloing a cheese (wooden of course) plus traditonal molly dancing (blacked up of course) Indian sword dancing (very colourful) and more beer. Much better than hurtling pell mell down a muddy hill.