Late night classical music

Perspective

Incredible

Gil Scott-Heron was wrong

When I think about you, I touch myself

Tip of the clown wig to @babelfishwars

Muzak

Humbling

What I'd give to be able to write stuff like this:

Imagine Rooney's head turning crimson as he vigorously bothers a bonk-eyed orange tart with the complimentary pillow mint stuck to her left buttock. Then picture him at the moment of fruition, twisted into a hooting, neckless mess of lust that will indelibly print itself into your mind, corrupting all your fondest memories.

Saturday night double feature

Tip of the clown wig to JohnW.

Possibly the best post he's ever written?

Old Holborn has a masterpiece up here. Do go and read it.

Ace!

Do NOT, under ANY circumstances, click this link. You WILL regret it.

Just because I want to...

Nighty night!

Just because I want to...

Nighty, night!

Just because I want to...

Rain

Remember that night?

I certainly do. It was fantastic, but it was curious how the audience politely enjoyed Gilmour's new stuff and exploded when he played Floyd.

Floyd's music is, to me, curiously timeless and beautifully structured: it sounds like there's more going on than is actually going on. And being able to hear some of the world's finest musicians play it live is about as close to rapture as I'm ever going to get.

RIP Charlie Wilson

Definitely one to watch if you haven't seen it already. I'll be raising a glass in his honour tonight.

Farewell to the Togmeister

It is with a heavy heart that I add my voice to the chorus of people bidding the corpsing old duffer goodbye.

Truly unique and magnificent, with both the ultimate face and moleskin trousers for radio, with the filthiest listeners in the whole of Christendom. I wish you were able to go on for ever!

Vale*, Sir Terry!

*I don't speak it. Thanks for the correction.

Happy memories

Bio-engineering

I read so much crap about the horrors of bio-engineering. You'd swear they're breeding fucking triffids to eat us all, or something, rather than finding ways of feeding more of us than ever before, for less money.

But here's something I don't think anyone can disagree with:

Land mines are currently strewn throughout 87 of the world’s countries, and each year they cause 15,000-20,000 new casualties, the vast majority of which are inflicted upon civilians. Sifting through minefields to remove these hidden threats is currently a dangerous, tedious, and expensive process, however scientists at the University of Edinburgh recently announced that they have engineered a strain of bacteria that glows green in the presence of explosives, making mine detection a snap.

Oh, those evil, deranged bio-engineering lunatics...

God bless B3ta!

Teh Funneh!

Update: From Mitch in the comments:

The Horror!!!

Now the racists and rapists
And open prison escapists
Were just passing by.

And the grabby types,
The Maddie types,
Who want to be a Daddy types
Were just passing by.

And the mug-you types,
And thug-you types
And like to have sex by drug-you types
Were just passing by.

Those on their own,
Fucking the phone
With squinty eyes looking like a clone
Were just passing by.

Trucker driving through
Who just got blew
And killed a hooker on the A32
Was just passing by.

And the IT bod
Sat in his pod
Choking on his tongue and writing his blog
Was just passing by.*

And the jobless types,
Who are not white
And used to pick cotton and fingers are light
Were just passing by.

And the sick perverts,
Who disconcert
The women with outrageous flirts
And like to fill their mouths with squirts
Were just passing by.

The Sickipedia folk,
Who share a joke;
See a duplicate and almost choke.
Waiting ages for Elton's stroke
Were just passing by.

There's a McDonalds for everyone.

*Nuffink to do wiv me, guv!