A new religion

A couple of days ago, it dawned on me why religion is becoming less relevant in our lives. It isn't. It's just that the god we worship is no longer the abstract skyfairy YHWH or his myriad descendants and variants, but the equally abstract (yet much more apparent) state.

Authoritarian worshippers of the two main factions (the Left and the Right) argue violently about which of them holds the keys to the True Way Forward To Holiness by insisting their grip on the levers of the state will lead to a path of plenty and righteousness.

As with most religious beliefs, the opportunities for apparently sensible, intelligent people to talk utter bullshit in defence of their religious hierarchy and slant on what the state should be are no more illogical and incomprehensible than Catholics refusing contraception in an era of HIV:

Funnily enough, last year one of those sympathetic to Brown had a very different take on a 17-year old tweeter. Graham Linehan noted in the case of “@Rileyy_69”, who was arrested for tweeting abuse (and a lame death threat) to Tom Daley:

As a symbol of free speech, Riley69 is not Lenny Bruce. He’s not even the EDL. He’s a teenager going through that thing a lot of teenagers go through where they seem unable to feel empathy. This kind of temporary sociopath can be very dangerous and using these new tools they can wreak havoc more efficiently than ever before.

He was all for Riley’s arrest - there was no ‘oh teenagers!’ on display here. Yet Riley69 wasn’t a public figure, just someone who had tweeted idiotic comments to a celebrity. If Tom Daley had quickly blocked him, almost no-one would have ever heard of him. Instead Daley alerted his followers and we ended up with people like Linehan defending Riley69’s arrest. The logic, then, that it’s simply awful to bring to light the casual homophobia/racism etc of a newly-pointed police figure but fine and dandy to arrest someone of the same age for their idiotic tweets seems rather…pained. It’s for this reason that I have zero doubt that, had Brown’s tweets not came to light via the Daily Mail but rather (say) through some left-wing blogger who presented them as highlighting her use of ‘faggots’, the response from many would be very different.

People on the Left will grumpily endorse actions from their bishops that would drive them insane if called for by the bishops of the Right and vice versa.

It's also ironic how many left-wing "atheists" will happily venerate the state to irrational heights. In a sense, I'd regard the Left as the devout Catholics of statism, and the Right as milque-toast CoE. The Left seem to have a peculiar belief in the holiness of the state: philanthropy and charity of individuals is shameful, the Holy State should provide for all from its extortion. The Right still go to church, but they've jettisoned some of the more ludicrous aspects of the theology.

Irrational, prone to violent and unreasoning reaction to heretics, filled with internecine squabbles and ridiculous sects, governed by arcane rules interpreted by people of dubious morality using their shamanic powers to hide disgusting deeds: religion has not gone away at all, the world has just adopted a hungrier, more violent god.

The Pope is a Dope

So much for infallibility: Da Pope has apparently been rumbled for dodgy dealings in Argentina. What is it with the Catlicks and fascism, eh, Benny?

But you have to admire his brass neck:

"The unjust distribution of goods persists, creating a situation of social sin that cries out to Heaven and limits the possibilities of a fuller life for so many of our brothers."

... said the man who is now in charge of one of the world's largest businesses, built almost entirely off extortion from the poorest and most vulnerable.

When these fuckers stop telling us how we have to change our ways to help out other and start changing their ways to help others, I'll start listening to them. Until then, they're no fucking different to a government.

Jesus wept.

As it were.

Hokeycokeyism

The brilliant Wat Tyler asks a very important question: why the fuck did the Pope's visit cost £12 million, when even Dubya only cost £4.1 million?

Hypocritical much?

I do probably have a bit more time for muckracker extraordinaire Guido Fawkes than some of my fellow libertarian bloggers. However, I did nearly shit my pants laughing at the idea that someone so happy to rake the muck on his foes might take umbrage at someone raking muck over his friends:

the metropolitan media have in recent weeks created a caricature of the Pope more visceral because it is framed as progressive and reasonable. It is little more than atheist bigotry dressed up in rationalist clothes.

Sure. Whereas your own muckracking is morally justified and pure.

Sorry Gweeds ... if you want to dish it out, you also have to suck it up.

Bloody Roman Catholics!

In an article that scales new summits, this is the stand out line:

When I heard the phrase 'third world', I didn't think he was being racist or particularly offensive, I just assumed he must have driven on a British motorway.

Celebrity overdose

I was tickled to find out about the huge demand for the Pope's visit over at the Bristolian:

Thousands of tickets remain unsold for events during the visit of the Pope, who arrives in Scotland on Thursday.

The largest organised event is an open-air Mass at Bellahouston Park in Glasgow on the opening day of Pope Benedict XVI's trip to the UK.

The capacity has been reduced to 80,000 after a slow take-up of tickets.

I wonder if the root cause of this isn't anything like what Dave thinks: he believes it's because fundamental Christianity (or indeed any Christianity) is increasingly irrelevant in our modern society.

I'm not so sure. Back when JP2 was Pope, there were many fewer celebrities than their are now. Many, many people would have gone to see the last Pope speak, not because they were fervent Catholics, but because it was a chance to see someone famous. Marginal Catholics would have gone to see the Pope for much the same reason.

But we are so inundated with "famous" people nowadays that the genuinely famous are reduced to mere high points in a wall of noise.

I was stuck in the doctor's surgery the other day and flipped through some or other "sleb" magazine, featuring the earth-shattering news that some former Big Brother "star" went and banged her equally "famous" co-star and ex-husband.

People were clearly willing to pay good money to read this tawdry drivel about two people who were not actually "has-beens", but rather "never-weres". And they pay this money on a weekly basis to find out more of this important and world-changing news.

Given that it's so easy and cheap to get a fix of "sleb", and given that most slebs have happily reduced the presentation of their lives to the same vacuous low standards, is it a surprise that no-one is happy to pay big money and expend any effort to go gawk at someone who really is famous*.

*This does not imply any kind of endorsement of Popes, Catholics, paedophiles or skyfairy fuckwittery.

Things that I really just did not know!

Since it's Sunday, I thought some biblical reflection may be in order.

Apparently, King James (he of the well-known bible version) was an avid uphill gardener. His favourite furrow to plough was apparently the Duke of B(uttf)uckingham.

A (careful) tip of the clown wig to the Whited Sepulchre.

Pope on a rope

Since it's Sunday, I suppose it's only right that I should turn my thoughts towards ecclesiastical matters.

I see that Pope Adolf is going to grace us with his infallible presence. And I see that it's going to cost us £20 million for the privilege. Now, I am fully aware that he is theoretically the head of a country, and we have certain obligations to foreign dignitaries. You can't just grab a couple of packets of Tesco Value crisps and some indifferent cheddar.

But after hearing that the last G20 cost north of a billion US, I'm getting a bit fucking sick of these cunts swanning around on our dime. If we're all feeling the pain equally, Dave, perhaps you can cut down a little on the twiglets and Ferrero Rocher? I mean, dropping a mill in a week is pretty fucking generous, 20 mill sounds ... how can I put this? Like you're taking the fucking piss?

You're supposed to be a fucking Tory, Dave. That means more than wearing a fucking blue tie to the office. You're supposed to represent careful husbandry of taxpayer resources.

So stop fucking pissing our money away on shit like this. You're not Gordon Brown, you know.

Cunt.

Everybody draw Mohammed ...

... and Aisha saying hello:



I'm a fucking useless artist, OK?

A reaction to the Catholic kiddy fiddler crisis

Update: This.

Yesss ...

Sometimes you read a blogpost and it just makes you feel a tangible sense of relief:

Dawkins is no humble seeker after truth. He is a grandstanding arsehole.

See, I'm an atheist. But I really struggle reading the abuse militant atheists spew out, it's completely indistinguishable from Fred Phelps in tone and content. And in much the same way I respect the ownership of physical things by people who've worked for them, I am quite happy that people believe whatever the fuck they want as long as they don't force it upon me.

I think that's a perfectly libertarian point of view.

Thought for the day

Imagine how different the story would've been if Jesus had been crucified on April Fool's Day...
-- Suman Biswas

CoE loses plot ... again? ... still?

An idiot, earlier

Dude? What the fuck?

The Taliban could be admired for their religious conviction and their sense of loyalty to each other, the new bishop for the Armed Forces said.

Right, so let's start off with a new bishop, keen to make his mark and earn the respect of his flock and he starts off, not by praising his flock, but by praising the enemy who is killing his flock. Then we go on to praise their conviction to a demented, sick pervesion of faith that encourages the murder of the members of the bishop's flock. Then we get him praising their loyalty, when actually, the bulk of them are only loyal to the £7 they get paid every day for killing the kuffaar.

Way to go, bish! Wrong in every possible way and you just know your flock are already going to be angling for you to wind up in a Helmand body bag, long before you even warm your new chair up with that stupid arse of yours.

Stupid fucking cunt.

Update: The idiot apologises:

The Right Reverend Dr Stephen Venner said his words had been taken out of context by the Daily Telegraph.

Of course.

Cunt.

Fuck me!

Labour have finally got something right!

Dr Williams told The Daily Telegraph: “The trouble with a lot of Government initiatives about faith is that they assume it is a problem, it’s an eccentricity, it’s practised by oddities, foreigners and minorities.

Me? Odd? Eccentric? Never!

“The effect is to de-normalise faith, to intensify the perception that faith is not part of our bloodstream. And, you know, in great swaths of the country that’s how it is.”

Wow! Is there no beginning to this man's insight?

Tell you what, you Nazi cunt ...

... why don't you open the coffers of the Catholic fucking church if you feel that strongly about it?

He will appeal to rich countries which are grappling with the global financial crisis not to forget Africa's acute needs.

Last time I looked, it was March, right?

Fucking unbelievable. Faith really can move mountains.

What next? Banning Agadoo?

Via Counting Cats, this utter cuntwaftery:

The Hokey Cokey is an old novelty song that has been sung in music halls, at children's parties and at sherry-fuelled family gatherings for many years.

But according to the Catholic Church and some Scottish politicians, singing the popular tune that begins with the words "You put your right hand in, your right hand out," may constitute an act of religious hatred.

A spokesman for the leader of the church in Scotland said the song had disturbing origins.

Critics claim that Puritans composed the song in the 18th century in an attempt to mock the actions and language of priests leading the Latin mass.

Now politicians have urged police to arrest anyone using the song to "taunt" Catholics under legislation designed to prevent incitement to religious hatred.

All I can say is:



What a complete fucking fatuity this is. I don't give a flying fuck about the origins of this terrible song, but rest assured that if it offends a Scottish politician, I will be singing it at the top of my voice every time I set foot in that fucking shithole of a frozen tundra.

Let me further guess that all those "assurances" given at the time of the passing of the fatuous Religious Hatred bill are not worth the spunk in a week-old used condom?

Cunts.

Update: Via the Croydonian in an unrelated post:

This calls for an Emo Phillips joke:

"I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious." I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?" He said, "Christian." I said, "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?" He said, "Baptist!" I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?" He said, "Baptist Church of God!" I said, "Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?" He said,"Reformed Baptist Church of God!" I said, "Me too! Are you reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.