Monday 6 October 2008

Whatever happened to "spread the other cheek"?

This sounds like a bit of a bummer:

The chaplain to the London Stock Exchange may be forced to walk the plank after demanding that gay chaps be tattooed with cig-packet-style health warnings highlighting the evils of boy-on-boy.

The Rev Peter Mullen, 66, declared on his blog: "It is time that religious believers began to recommend ... discouragements of homosexual practices after the style of warnings on cigarette packets. Let us make it obligatory for homosexuals to have their backsides tattooed with the slogan SODOMY CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH and their chins with FELLATIO KILLS."


I've been fellated many times, albeit never by a bloke. Shall I get the missus tattooed on the chin? And I'm too much of a gentleman to make any remarks about taking young ladies up the Oxo Tower, although I have done so. And on purpose, on occasion! Am I doomed to eternal damnation and hellfire?

8 comments:

Pogo said...

"When Lord Clancy became a nancy
it sure upset the family's fancy.
So, in order to protect 'im,
did have inscribed upon his rectum:
'All commoners must now yield steerage,
this arsehole is reserved for peerage."

(trad)

Aye thang yow...

Panopticon Britain said...

I thought fags already had health warnings?

Furry Conservative said...

"Fellatio Kills"? Sounds like a character in a porn version of "The Merchant of Venice" (now available on DVD from WH Smith).

Anonymous said...

Nah, Fellatio was in Hamlet.

Obonoxio. Yes, you are going to hell but not for sodomy. I somehow suspect your crimes are much worse than that.

Anonymous said...

A geek getting laid?

Now that is funny.

Obnoxio The Clown said...

@nbc: and by an actual, live human woman, too.

Mark Wadsworth said...

In reply to that last question, apparently not. I once stumbled across a slightly pervy Christian website that said there are a load of approving references in the Bibble to men doing women up the bum.

Which was a great relief to me ... until I remembered I was an atheist anyway.

The Whited Sepulchre said...

Alas, poor Fellatio. I knew him well.

Ok....somebody else take it from there.